Thursday, 7 July 2011

Saved by the Lycra

What I witnessed this afternoon was the most inappropriate piece of driving I've ever seen. And I'm no spring chicken! I can't imagine what was so important for someone to feel that they had the right to drive so fast and so selfishly around narrow Cornish lanes. It was the action of an inexperienced and immature driver completely lacking judgement. The fact that he and I are still here, came down to luck, not his skill.

This afternoon I went for a bike ride. Thought I'd go for a quick blast while I had the chance. I turned out of our road heading past Carruan Farm on my left. As I approached the final bend before heading along the straight towards the turning for New Polzeath, this car came around the corner. And it was shifting. Shifting so fast that the back wheels were struggling to grip the road and only inches from the hedge. It was in effect traveling sideways, it's headlamps pointed in my direction. Yeah it was a bit scary. I could tell from the drivers reaction that he too was concerned. He was out of control and out of his mind. What was he thinking?

Mad? I was furious! But I knew who he was. I'd seen the same driver with most of his wheels off the ground traveling at ridiculous speed over the brow of a hill, just outside Wadebridge. My ride was over. I headed back to the beach where I knew he worked. A female police officer happened to be there, so I took up my complaint with her. Still dressed in lycra, confrontation didn't seem like the most sensible thing for me to get into. If I'd have been normally attired, I may well have boffed him one on the nose (something I've never done before). If the police officer had witnessed what I had just seen, he would have lost his licence, no question. I cycled home, got changed, calmed down and drove back to the beach, where he still was.

We had a chat, and to be fair he apologised. He knew he'd done wrong. He's not a bad lad, just a young boy lacking experience. He thinks he's invincible. But he's not. There have been plenty of fatal car crashes in this area. We don't want another one.

We've all been there - that taste of freedom and independence. We've all gone too fast. I know I did. But this was rally driving on a minor road. So this is his wake up call. Had there been walkers on that side of the road, as there sometimes are, he'd have got them all. Had he slid one more inch and clipped the bank, neither he nor I would be here this evening. How we chooses to drive from now on will say a lot about his character. Let's hope for mine, yours, you kids and his sake, he considers his actions and slows down.

His friends will probably find this all very funny and heroic. The people that really care about him, will take him to one side and I'm sure will have a little word in his ear.

Update: In recounting my story this morning I hear from others that he likes to time his runs! Around small Cornish roads? See how quick he can get from A to B. I'm going to report him this morning to the police. Hopefully a considerable hike in insurance premiums will focus his mind and with a bit of luck get him taken off the road. That would be the best scenario for all concerned.

Big and Messy

Big Sam taking on the chunky surf conditions this morning.

Wednesday, 6 July 2011


I can't deny that we had some fun tonight at Greenaway, me and Libby. Well sketchy as the surf raced up the beach. Not only did it race up, but on this shot above, that surge that you can see came right around the back of us! Surf was pumping and dumping!!

Nothing to Report

We're busy with school groups, but it's pretty quiet around on the beach in general. I'd have to say that apart from weekends, Polzeath is definitely quieter than normal. That's not a bad thing!

Just seen the Swagger Jagger vid from Cher. Am I the only one that likes it? Get, get, get up on the floor!!

Tuesday, 5 July 2011

Snoop Dog

'Instructor Bonding' on Saturday night. All in good spirits. Sounds like it went well. I met up with them for some photos before they toddled off with Wail and Sam to various drinking holes around town. Kelly (on left) is Snoop Dog! (added later: I've just seen some of the photos from the other night and I can indeed confirm that a good time was had by all - and there's absolutely no way I'm putting the snaps on here!!)

I've said it before, I'll say it again and fingers crossed, I'll be saying it in the future - this is a great team. Good vibe on the beach, in the office and shop.

I forgot my camera this morning! So it'll have to be a sunset one from last night.
Oh and I should give a big mention to St. Minver School, who for the first time in many years won the District Sports. Here's Billy taking the 200m in his stride. Fit as a fiddle he is. Findog too, although I didn't get a photo as his 400m race was super close and I was cheering too much!

Monday, 4 July 2011

Dog Whisperer

Glorious beach day! 2ft, light offshore, sun's on full beam! It's school activity week - this is what we trained for!

Following a rather lengthy bike ride yesterday, taking in the sites of Torpoint, Downderry, Looe, Liskeard, Bodmin, Wadebridge back to Polzeath I ended up collapsed on my bed looking up at the light (turned on) dangling from the ceiling. It was at this point that my research began. My observations were recorded as follows -

That a fly will circle clockwise five times, before performing a figure of eight and then doing five times anti-clockwise. The pattern is then repeated indefinitely. This presumably is to counter act any possibility of dizziness. I cannot comment with any real certainty what came first - the clockwise or the anti-clockwise.

Having been hypnotised by the fly, I decided that it would be fun to try and hypnotise my dog.

I summoned Libby to the bedroom. "Libby Loo." She came. "Sit!" She obliged, she's a Lab, keen to please. "Good girl!" I hovered my finger above her big black nose and then did small circles around her snout. This caused her to open her mouth nice and wide, her big brown eyes fully focused on the tip of my index. I made the circles progressively wider and wider, until her mouth would stretch no more, and she yawned! Worked every time. That's a great game!

So what can we learn from the above? That I need to drink more on long rides! That's pretty clear. Having said that I forwarded my fly observations to Falmouth Uni last night and they sent me a 2:1 by special delivery. Crammed three years work into an afternoon, and saved myself twenty seven K!

It was hot yesterday, mind. I came back from my ride with a good Poo Head and some wicked Farmers arms.

We have a group of German students staying with us at the moment. Last year I made a joke on here about the German sausage as they took to walking around on the Beach House decking in their 'Budgie smugglers'. Turns out my sense of humour didn't travel. Anyway, they're a credit to their school. Organised, polite, appreciative, athletic, quick learners - they've got a great positive mind set. No question, they're a top crew, very welcome and we enjoy having them to stay.

Whilst I cycled, Janey drove the Mondeo Estate back from Plymouth yesterday. First time she'd driven the monster. "My legs were a bit short." she commented. "Nonsense." I replied. "They touch the floor." Mind you as she drove past I was reminded of the dwarf that Richard Hammond had as a co-pilot on Top Gear. Could just see the top of her head!