I've got to Flag this up!

Serial killer vvvvWagner lives another day - he's murdered so many golden oldies I'm amazed he's not helping the police with their enquiries. I get the anti X factor voting thing, but the point's been made - he has to go!

The Scottish football referees are going on strike. Too much abuse apparently! I can offer some real life experience to this situation! "Would you run the line?" was the question I was asked by the referee yesterday morning, some 60 seconds before the start of Billy's match against Truro. The linesman hadn't turned up - and I was the most handsome! I have enough experience to be linesman for at least half a game, I reasoned. Enough life experience to be assertive; enough football experience to be conversant with the rules. I took the flag with confidence. How hard could it be?

Much harder than I'd ever imagined, turns out. I was rubbish. It took me ages to work out that if whites hit the ball out that meant that it was a red throw and they were going in that direction and that meant that the flag had to be pointed in that direction! Rabbit in headlights - that was me. By the time I'd sorted it out in my own mind, the play had moved down the other end of the pitch. Without the flag in my hand, it would have been simple as. The responsibility of the flag was too much! And then to make matters worse and totally confuse the players, the ref and supporters, I opted for the rugby signaling method. Raise flag with one arm, point to the team who have the throw in. This is completely about face! The assertiveness drained from my body - instead of any firm confidence inspiring flag action, I offered up a very weak half up, half down, this hand, that hand, wish washy thingy, "is it.... this way?" It was pathetic. I was pathetic. I don;t even want even talk about offsides - far too upsetting! At half time I was relieved to hand the baton over! No sorry that's incorrect - that should read, I was relieved of any flag duties, on a permanent basis!

So I have real sympathy for the the men in the middle. How easy would it be to change the culture? You would never, for example, ever see a rugby player run 50 yards to confront the ref about a decision they don't agree with. And if you did they'd be up in front of the board. And yet we see it every week on the telly and on the pitch! The captain should be able to ask in a civil manner why a decision has been made, so that they have the opportunity to understand the refs interpretation of the offence, but that's it. Any confrontation and off you toddle to soak on your lonesome in some warm bubbles with a letter highlighting a three match ban! Stand strong Scots refs, I'm right behind you! Just don't give me any flags to wave!

Here's Surf's Up! instructor Megarooney ripping it up last week. (www.360photography.co.uk.) She's back in the zone and keen to get back on the competition trail next year!